


Normal

by lrhaboggle



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Comfort, Fear, Insecurity, LGBT, LaFerry - Freeform, Poor Perry, Season 2, Unhappiness, be normal, mother hen Perry, no possession, normal - Freeform, normality
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-07
Updated: 2018-04-07
Packaged: 2019-04-19 17:17:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,564
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14242086
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lrhaboggle/pseuds/lrhaboggle
Summary: Perry just wanted everything to be nice and normal. Why was that such a crime? Maybe she would've been happier if she had been a little bit more like the others... But she didn't want to be someone she wasn't! What was a conflicted young woman to do?





	Normal

"Perry?" a voice called out to the young woman curled up on her bed crying.

"LaFontaine?" Perry responded in terror, trying to swallow her tears before her friend would see. "You're back already?"

"Yeah, we had to cut our excursion short because of an impromptu patrol," Lafontaine responded tiredly. "What's up with you?"

"Oh, nothing!" Perry meant to sound genuine, but since it was a lie, her voice became too chipper too fast. Lafontaine entered the room with a skeptic look on their face and sat beside Perry on the bed.

"Come on, Perr, even if we aren't in our old dorms, I'm still the official truth-teller of the group and I can tell when somebody's lying. Especially if it's you," Lafontaine nudged Perry playfully in attempt to cheer her up, but it yielded no response.

"I'm just tired," the taller, older girl mumbled finally.

"Sure you are," Lafontaine responded skeptically again. Slowly, however, their disdainful expression melted into one of true concern. For all of their fights and differences, Lafontaine loved Perry more than anything in the whole world and, in their eyes, anything that hurt Perry even a little had to be eliminated at once. Even in dire times like this, this belief still stood. And it was clear that Perry was hurting. If she wasn't, she would've responded by now, but this continued gloominess was a bit much, even for Perry. Clearly, something was wrong. They could feel it in the air.

"Come on, Perr, talk to me," Lafontaine pleaded next, scooting closer to the still curled-up Perry. "You can tell me anything!"

"I'm fine," Perry responded stubbornly.

"We're friends!" Lafontaine pleaded.

"It's nothing," Perry argued.

The pair continued this weak banter that was more to hear their own voices than anything but then, Perry finally heaved a sigh.

"I just don't belong here," she confessed. "Everybody else seems to fit in. Carmilla's a vampire, Laura's in love with a vampire, and you're just excited about researching whatever unspeakable horror we've stepped in this week and I'm just tired of being attacked and threatened and scared," Perry paused as a sob escaped her. "I'm just tired of feeling out of place and feeling second best to the rest of you! I'm not like you! And you all know it. You're all so strong and brave and into this weird crap and I'm… just… not. I'm not. I'm not into this stuff. I'm not into the creepy or the crawly or anything else. I just want everything to be normal,"

Perry continued to lament for a little while longer while Lafontaine listened in sadly. They always knew Perry was a little more sensitive to the weird and wild than anybody else, but actually seeing a real breakdown was so much different. To actually see Perry look so weary and defeated and to actually hear Perry confess feeling inferior was something entirely different than joking around that Perry was the only sane girl of the group. It was something different enough that it genuinely scared Lafontaine and such a thing was not a common occurrence.

At last, Perry finished her sad speech and allowed her tears to fall. Lafontaine heaved a sigh before reaching out to caress Perry's curls.

"Oh, Perry," Lafontaine began, voice full of compassion. "We're all scared now, even if we don't seem scared. It's not just you. It's all of us! But it's ok! It's ok to be afraid! Especially in times like this. And believe me, you're less of an outcast than you think," they said. Perry looked up at them, misery in her gray eyes. It broke Lafontaine's heart, but they carried on. "Yeah, you're different from the rest of us in the sense that you don't like anything other than normality, but that doesn't mean you don't fit in and that doesn't mean you're wrong or weird. We love you. We all love you. We all love all of you! And we need you!" they finished, trying to smile in a friendly and reassuring way.

"No you don't!" Perry moaned sadly, still halfway buried into her pillow. "You all need someone as into the weird as you are. I just want everything to be normal and nice. I don't belong here!" she finished with an anguished shout and Lafontaine sighed heavily. For once, they were at a loss for words. Every fiber of their being wanted them to get Perry to see that it didn't matter if she liked things normal or insane, she was loved just the way she was. Unfortunately, Lafontaine had no idea how to articulate this in a believable way.

But that wouldn't stop them from trying!

"Perry? Listen to me," they said slowly.

"I'm listening," Perry grunted back.

"I know it may sound cheesy and you might not believe me, but this is something you need to here," they said, then they explained. "I know you think you're the outcast just because you're the only one who likes things to be normal, but I assure that that's far from true. Though it makes you different, it does not make you an outcast. And listen to me well, if anyone even suggests that liking normality makes you a freak or a loser, I promise I will end them!" Lafontaine scowled fiercely and Perry couldn't stop a laugh. Lafontaine was too cute to be scary. "Liking normality may make you different, but differences are what make us all unique! Your love of normality doesn't contrast, it compliments. It's what's special about you and if it's something you value, then nobody has any right to give you any crap for it, understand?"

Lafontaine continued to drill Perry over how her simplistic mindset was not to be teased or destroyed, but rather, to be respected and cared for. They spent a good 30 minutes trying to get Perry to understand that there was nothing wrong with liking the mundane or wanting to have a simple and unexciting life. There was nothing wrong with not having massive ambitions. They continued to reassure Perry of this. At last, it seemed to take effect. Despite herself, Perry began to believe her friend.

"I guess you're right," she murmured finally.

"Of course I am!" Lafontaine pretended to puff out their chest and Perry laughed again.

"Maybe it is ok if I like things to be normal. I mean, you all do still hang out with me so you must accept me on some level, right?" she asked.

"Of course we do!" Lafontaine nodded boisterously, wanting Perry to understand how loved she was even if she didn't think she was. She was not the token normal friend, no matter what anyone said.

"Oh Perry, I know you think that your desire for normality marks you as an outcast, but I think it's endearing," they said. "Yeah, it's a little annoying at times and maybe even almost weird in its own right, but it's mostly endearing. Mostly…" they finished.

"Hey!" Perry pretended to huff angrily.

"Kidding, kidding," Lafontaine laughed back. "Your want of a simple and peaceful, unexciting life is what makes you who you are and I love you for that! I mean, it wouldn't be you if you weren't normal, you know?" they asked.

"I know," Perry promised, a smile evident in her soft voice.

"Besides," Lafontaine cleared their throat. "We do all need some normality once in awhile and who better to ask than you?"

"Ha, ha," Perry rolled her stormy gray eyes.

"Seriously," Lafontaine pleaded. "Try to love your quirks because they are what make you special, not an outcast! I wouldn't want you to change for anything unless you wanted to change for your own self. And if anyone tries to tell you otherwise, I'm gonna beat them up!"

Lafontaine's face scrunched up indignantly again as they imagined somebody bullying Perry for being the most boring of the squad (which was totally not true). Perry found the face quite adorable and the protectiveness she felt coming off of Lafontaine was sweet. She finally began to see that wanting things to be normal was no less than wanting things to be exciting. It was only society's stupid belief that only the big dreamers were worth anything at all. It was all a bunch of hooey!

At last, Perry managed a smile. Lafontaine saw it and their own face split into a grin.

"See? There you go! You're getting it now! You're seeing it too!" they cried, pointing at Perry's smile.

"You Weirdo," Perry responded with a laugh-sob.

"Mother Goose," Lafontaine responded, sticking their tongue out affectionately. Then they curled up beside Perry, lowering her back down onto the bed and spooning her even though they were a bit shorter. Perry laughed lightly and snuggled deeper into their arms. They gave a contended sigh as they felt Perry come closer and Perry echoed the sound as she felt Lafontaine begin to kiss her back and shoulders. For the first time in a long time, everything was right again in the world of Lola Perry. There was nothing to fear or hide from and everything was all lovely and nice. Yes, with Lafontaine at her side, Perry felt like she was invincible and not a single thing was out of order. With Lafontaine at her side, Perry was in paradise and, just for a moment, everything was perfectly normal.

**Author's Note:**

> AN: This is supposed to be almost an inversion upon my last Perry Analysis (Special) in the sense that this analysis covers Perry's desire for a nice, quiet, and stable life where the other one mused upon the idea of Perry actually wanting some adventure and attention. I just think it's cool how Perry could easily fit both of these ideas, depending how you look at her, and even though it's paradoxical, it's not contradictory. (And yes, once again, this is semi-author insert because I feel like one of the few people I know who doesn't really have big dreams even though the world tells me the only people who will ever have good lives are those with ambitions. I think that's a terrible message to send).
> 
> Also, in regard to canon, this slightly alters the "Perry talks to Laf and JP" by having it take place in their bedroom and without JP. In addition, even though I know Perry is possessed at this point, this particular canon says that the possession is sporadic and sometimes, S2 Perry is the real Perry and it's not until S3 that the dean takes 24/7 control of Perry. 
> 
> (I argue that this makes sense because some of the things S2 Perry does seems too Perry to be fake and besides, if those who are possessed do not remember the possession in question, it makes sense that Perry wouldn't ever say "Hey guys, I think I'm possessed!" or "I think I've been possessed for this whole semester!" because she's just as ignorant to the truth as everyone else).


End file.
